


The way we aren't

by Rubyrose0736



Category: Agent Carter (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Modern day college AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-20
Updated: 2015-06-20
Packaged: 2018-04-05 06:29:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4169451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rubyrose0736/pseuds/Rubyrose0736
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Basically a modern day college au with Peggy, Angie as central characters with Natasha, Captain America, Iron Man etc etc as back up characters. Bit of a plot line to get to college though! Involves time travelling!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Regret

"DUCK!" Timeslip shrieks out toward the strange man in front of her. His shoulders are slumped inward and his eyes are heavily lidded. How he kept his composure this far, she was unsure. His hair was disheveled and uncombed... This wasn't the man she remembered. He was meticulous and full of energy. He fought with courage and hope, not as if merely going through a mundane task. Upon hearing her holler, he collapses onto the floor, rolling to simply come to his feet again near the stranger, Timeslip.

"Not that I don't appreciate the help, Ma'am, but may I enquire as to who you are?" He mutters as eloquently as can during the line of fire. Lazily, he raises his shield to repel the ongoing bullets from the Doombots.  
She leers at his stance and sighs. He often spoke of this time period. She didn't know him during these years, but his future self she knew as well as he allowed her to. Considering not many knew much about him, she'd say his future self and her were the best of friends.

 

Timeslip raises her weapon of choice, a spear of some sort (he notes), and hurls it at one of the Doombots, twisting her arm over his shield. The two move in a tandem as she continues hurling her mini spears and he deflects the bullets.  
Brushing her arms off, she surveys the room and walks forward to begin pulling the spears from the remaining "corpses".  
"My name is Timeslip, I come from the future or rather an alternate future... I hope! This time travel business is very confusing. Years from now-"  
"Ma'am, I hate to be impolite because I was raised better, but I'd rather not discuss the future if that's alright with you."  
"Nonsense Rogers, let me explain the situation first. If you wish I'll explain as best I can without referring to the future and then you can agree if you're willing to listen to the whole story."  
"Yes Ma'am."  
"Slip!"  
"Pardon?"  
"We're dear friends Rogers, you call me Slip. Not ma'am or Timeslip. Simply Slip. You named me you know. Before you came along I was simply Rina."

"I apologize... Slip." He says hesitantly. It's been far too long since he's been on a first name basis with anyone. It stings slightly but he pushes past it.

Pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration, she begins her tale.  
"Sometime in the future Doctor Doom, you remember him? The man who saved your life. Anyway, he creates, well it doesn't matter what he creates. The point is someone dear to everyone dies due to... This creation."  
"...Slip, I know I shouldn't be hesitant because I was just entombed in ice for 30 years but, the future? I'm just a kid from Brooklyn. I don't know you, I don't know how your powers work. I don't know what alternate time means. I'm just a kid from Brooklyn..." He casts his eyes downward as if ashamed. Even after years of his powers, he believes in America. The ordinary America, with big dreams and kind eyes. Not the one with mutants looming at every corner. 

 

"Yes, I'm well aware of your encasement and your origin. You have every right to be hesitant Rogers. My powers are a bit complex. In short, I have the ability to swap consciousness with any of my past or future selves. My conscious from the future came to this younger version of me and my younger consciousness has gone into my older body. 

The alternate universe is slightly more tricky to explain. Every single moment we decide a course of action, millions of universes, all parallel to one another exist in which we chose another action. So by coming here, to my past, I've already created another universe. I want to create a universe were my future isn't filled with gloom and dread."

"Why me though, ma'am?"

She sighs and scrunches her eyebrows with slight annoyance. Her captain wouldn't question so much, he'd take action.

"In the future, you share tales with me of this time period. I remember one more than others, you said that during those years in that... Pod of ice, you were aware. Most people believed you were dormant but you felt your body go numb and felt the pain spread to your brain. You told me that even to MY present day, there are days where you feel exactly how you did during the ice period."

"So you were saying, someone important dies." 

She quickly attempts to hide her grin. Now this is her captain. Quick to avoid personal issues and get back to the mission at hand.

She always admired that about the captain. He truly was a hero. Despite his current mental state, he carried this façade the way he carried his shield, with the pride and hope of the American people latched on.

"So I spoke to the Time-Keepers of my present and they said we were fresh out of luck so I used my own powers to project myself to this time to speak to the Time-Keepers of this presence to rectify the situation."  
"Is that all? The Time-Keepers can reverse time, alter it, take a physical body out of one period and submerge it into another. What is your plan here exactly?" He snaps, breathing hard as he makes his way to the Doombots and snaps the metallic neck off one with a twist of his wrist. He can't help but picture Peggy. "Who is it? Who dies now?" He mutters to himself as he kicks the Bot's making sure they're no longer alive.  
"It's -"  
"No. Stop. Don't tell me" he motions with his hands in the air that he's had enough.  
"Fine. I came to this time hoping the Time-Keepers would transport some of your best warriors to my current time, yourself excluded seeing as how you are in my future."  
"My best warriors?"  
"Steve..." She begins softly and hesitantly "People throughout the ages, dead or alive, to help..."  
"Peggy."  
"Yeah..."  
"I have to go. We'll be in contact. I agree with you, but I need some time Ma'am"  
She flinches at the sound of ma'am. This isn't her Captain, but she needs him and he clearly needs her.  
\----------------

The war had etched itself onto his lungs, it trickled it's way into his heart and seared itself into his eyes. Everywhere he went he saw Peggy's face and the corpses of the destructive path he's left behind him. He can't help but clench his fists at the imagery. He always thought himself as someone who valued peace over violence but lately peace was the furthest from his mind. He was angry, all the time. He was angry with himself for no longer missing Peggy. After years in isolation, he no longer craved her as he once did and the revelation shattered his heart. He knows she's alive some place, but he has yet to visit her. This Peggy he isn't in love with. This Peggy is the same Peggy but she's not HIS Peggy. She's not his girl anymore and he doesn't want her to be. He feels the guilt cloud against his fingers as he grips onto his bottle of beer and shakes his head. What would Peggy say if she saw him in this state? What would Peggy do if she knew he was purposely avoiding her?  
He rises to his feet and makes his way toward the address scrawled on the piece of paper that's been burning a hole in his trousers since he's awoken from the many years of ice. The address is embedded in his brain but he continues carrying the paper around, it weighs him down and if he's being honest with himself, he needs the anchor.  
He turns the corner into Peggy's block and slows his pace. What if she doesn't remember him? He groans internally for thinking such foolish thoughts and shuffles off onto her driveway.  
He rings the doorbell and rubs his feet against each other as he glances at his watch.  
"Jeesh English! I heard the doorbell, I'm on my way, quit your yappin--" The door swings open and the woman in front of him stares as she shakes her head. She has crystal blue eyes and he can't help but smile. She's filled with a jubilant aura and her eyes are embedded with aspirations and love. He feels the compassion radiate off her. "Captain America?" She addresses him quickly in shock.  
"Yes, ma'am. My name is Steve Rogers. I'm here to see Margaret Carter."  
"No! I mean yes! I know who you are, but it's 1975! You were born in the 1920 and encased in 1945. You're SO young! It's been 30 years." She gushes as she stares with widened eyes.  
"Yes, ma'am-"  
"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry! I haven't even invited you in! Where are my manners? I'm Angie, Angie Martinelli, please come in. Pegs is going to die once she sees you. She talks about you, you know? She always had hope and ---" Angie's voice easily carries throughout the entire house as they make their way inward but she's abruptly silenced as Peggy gathers to her feet and throws herself in Steve's arms. He wraps his arms around Peggy and slumps all his weight onto her, not surprised she can hold him easily.   
"Steve! It can't be. How? Bloody hell, what does it matter! You're here. Are you okay?"  
"Yes, Peggy. I'm fine. How are you?" He unwraps himself from her arms as she points toward the chairs. They gather around and make themselves comfortable.  
"I'll go make some tea! Leave you two to communicate without the "Civilian" around" Angie giggles as she stands.  
"Angie, I---" Peggy is shushed with a quick kiss to her check.  
"Yeah, yeah English. One sugar"  
"Hold the milk" Angie and Steve mutter as they look at Peggy.  
Steve reddens and looks sheepish as he mumbles out an apology.  
"What're you apologizin' for Cap?" Angie asks with innocent curiosity.  
"For the way things happened. I would take it all back if I could. I'd do things so differently, Peggy. I wouldn't have left you, I'm so sorry" his voice begins to crack and his shoulders heave forward. Peggy instantly wraps her arms around his figure and soothes his hair. Angie rapidly makes her way out of the room, leaving the woman she loves clutched to Steve.  
"Peggy, I'm just so sorry. I left you, by yourself. I moved on Peggy. Being stuck in ice, I moved on and I didn't want to. I love you but not the way I did." She rocks his figure and slightly sings until his breathing evens out. Eventually she releases her grasp on his torso and sits back down in her respective space. Years without his warmth and compassion had left her to generate her own heat just to survive. So now being around his warmth has left her suffocating, struggling for air. Gasping for some freshness. Years without his words of patience and confidence have led to her own shaky voice become steady, whispering words of encouragement to herself. She became whole without the captain and she's loved the feeling.  
"You can come back in now Ang" Peggy calls out with a mischievous grin and she whispers to Steve "She's so polite but I know her so well. She was waiting to enter the living room once again"  
Angie shuffles over as she passes everyone their tea and sits beside Peggy.  
"Thanks, English. It's a bit hot though. We should let it cool beforehand."  
They set their tea down and Steve watches the two women move in harmony against each other as if they've had years of practice.  
Angie shifts on the couch crossing her legs at her ankles and leans slightly to the right as Peggy moves her feet clear of Angie's incoming feet and leans slightly to the left so their shoulders touch.  
Steve smiles politely and sets his tea down as well.  
"I want to apologize for not coming sooner, Peggy."

"No need to apologize , Steve. I understand it." Peggy nods politely and entwines her hands with Angie's squeezing softly before turning around to face her, smiling slightly. "You never have to apologise, Steve. It was years ago and I'm happy, truly happy."


	2. Heat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So many feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UGHHHH so sorry. I decided to take summer courses (if you're considering them... DONT!)  
> Assigned today and due tomorrow: 80 pages of reading detailed with notes  
> 40 pages of reading - answer 25 questions with a minimum of 6 sentences each  
> Watch an hour and 40 minute film and annotate on sound/mood just so much bs  
> On the positive side, I'm taking women's history and an english course (yes another!) 
> 
> No beta once again so any errors etc would be nice if any of you are reading this

1940 (20 year old Peggy 6 months before she meets Steve Rogers)

She sits at the corner window of the establishment and sips her tea, scrutinising the people perambulating outside. She notes that they're content but can't comprehend why. There's a war waging on, millions are killed, diseases are rampant and she's just SO helpless. Are they ignorant? How can anyone be happy in a time like this? 

She's always prided herself in being independent but if she's being honest, she's not. She builds these walls, to protect herself, she says. She's been hurt too often, it's the white noise of her childhood. Constant and exasperating. 

Her parents squabbled for ages, never releasing their claws from one another and she dreams that will never be her. She prays that she won't find herself so invested in someone that's clearly so wrong for her. She entreats to anyone listening (mostly her own subconscious) that she won't get so entrusted in one single person that she loses her identity. She doesn't want to be that girl everyone knows as the one who dated so and so. She wants to be Peggy Carter.

Too often she's read novels of young couples, how their entire lives they've felt incomplete until the moment they meet "The One". She refuses to allow herself to become one of those women. To become dependent on someone else to be satisfied. She wants to feel whole herself and currently she's not. She's frosty and icy inside, seeking warmth in anything or anyone willing to share.  
\----------------------

1941 (8 months after she's met Steve Rogers)  
Steve has his arms wrapped around Peggy, slowly tightening his grip. He likes Peggy, truly likes her. Sure he's got women throwing themselves at him now, but Peggy was there with a kind smile and big dreams before "the incident". She reminds him of the America he dreams for. 

He calls his powers the incident because it's gotten hard to accept. He should be filled to the brim with happiness, but he isn't. He's got this life, of parading around. Not doing any actual lick of goodness, which is why he turned to the incident to begin with. Which is why he left Bucky. He was sick of feeling helpless. Maybe that's why he likes Peggy, they both feel so helpless in a world that needs all the help it can get.

He doesn't feel blessed or fortunate that he's found Peggy, but he should. She liked him before and she still likes him now. He remembers Bucky, with his wild untameable hair and his lopsided grin, it was more like a cocky grin, but around Steve it was always a lopsided smile.  
He remembers how Bucky constantly attempted to get Steve to meet women and he couldn't fathom why. He wasn't anything special, women flocked around Bucky and avoided guys like Steve.  
"You listen here, Steve, any dame worth her salt can see you're a real man". Bucky's words echo inside of his head... Yeah, he should be lucky he found Peggy except he doesn't know what to do with her. He doesn't know how to manoeuvre around her, feet here, hands there, tilt the head to side... He's just not sure. His jagged parts don't match with her smooth ones, he says. He's got all these scars and she's just so perfect. She has no flaws, he chants to himself. 

She's good for you, Steve.  
You two can have a future together, Steve.  
She can take care of you, Steve.

It's become the mantra of his life now.  
\--------------  
1941 (a year after she's met Captain America)

 

Distress and anguish are the highlights of her year. 

Peggy walks in one afternoon into Steve's apartment. They haven't seen each other in over a week and it's long overdue. She's had the time, she just hasn't wanted to. She should feel more with Steve, but she doesn't. Maybe he's too good for her, she whispers as silently as possible.

It's a humid day outside, the heat is graspable. It's swelling and choking the air out of her lungs. Lately she's been relying on Steve's warmth. She finds herself freezing when he's not around. She isn't whole yet, but being around him makes her whole. She isn't sure if she enjoys the feeling yet and so they go periods without acknowledging the other and the remainder of the time is spent between their lips, pressing heatedly with a sort of desperation that can't be any good for either of them.

His house is bare, minimal furniture and no true decorations to indicate anyone is living there. There's plain colours haphazardly strewn across the bedroom. A hint of brown here, a tad bit of blacks and greys. It's all these dull colours in one room. She surveys the room, breathing a sigh of relief that Steve isn't here. 

She strays into the kitchen and nearly trips over something solid in the ground. She finds Steve, face down. His breath is hitched and he's making sobbing noises. The tears are caught in his throat and she merely stares at him. After a few seconds, or minutes, she can't tell, she reaches a tentative hand and places it on Steve's shoulder. He's quick to move away and wrap himself in a ball. He makes himself as tiny as possible as to avoid her hands.

She walks out the house and avoids him for another week. They do not discuss it again. 

\-------------

1945 (4 months after Captain America was declared dead)

 

Peggy sits in the corner of the room, dusk is approaching and the fog begins rolling in through the windows of the foyer. The room around is grandiose and each wall contains countless windows. The breeze is strong and surrounds the entire room. Peggy often finds herself sitting as bare as respectably possible with all the windows open. Something about the freezing cold piercing into her skin soothes her. Perhaps the cold reminds her of Steve in that popsicle and nowadays she will do anything to be close to him again.

 

Lately, she's found her teeth chattering, her heart growing numb without his warmth. Maybe this is what she's destined for. She's a true believer in karma, maybe this is her punishment for never truly being in love with Steve. She deserves this constant ache in her heart because he gave his all to her and she barely gave an inch. 

 

The world around her mourned together for Captain America and together they moved on. The world continued and new heroes arrived but Peggy couldn't forget. She couldn't forget how his arms wrapped around her and gripped onto her shoulders, how his lips would feel against her flesh and overall she couldn't forget how his love and attention made her feel. She wasn't in love but she appreciated that she had someone. Someone who was willing to listen and make her feel important. So every night, in her house gown she shuffles her feet down the stairs, open all the windows possible, and embraces the cold as if it were her Steve she was embracing.  
\---------------  
(6 months after Captain America is declared dead)

 

"Come on, Peg! Let's go eat some food. MY treat!" He winks with a mischievous grin.  
"Peggy" she says as she rests her head against her legs, her words come out muffled but Howard shakes his head.  
"PEG. Get up. We're going to get food. Steve wouldn't want to see you this way! I'm just asking for one crummy meal!"  
"Peggy. Don't call me Peg. Peggy, but fine, alright. We all know what a child you are, if I don't succumb now, I won't hear the end of this bloody rant." She holds onto the wall and pulls herself up, straightening out her hair and adjusting her dress. She's glad she took the time to get slightly decent today. "Not some fancy restaurant, Howard, okay? Keep it simple. Please"  
"No problem! There's a diner right around the corner."  
"Sounds fantastic"

They both walk quietly and calmly through the street, afraid of what to say aloud. Once they were the closest of friends, willing to confide, but for now, they feel like strangers to one another.  
"I miss him too, Margaret, you know? There isn't a day that goes by that I don't but we have to move on, you know? I'm sorry."  
Peggy nods her head and nudges his shoulder. She knows he's right but it won't the make the pit in her stomach go away. It won't make her stop waking up in the middle of the night sobbing for breath and it won't make Steve's shadow stop looming over her body as she goes around her daily tasks.

She's not sure why it hurts so much, they weren't meant for each other. Maybe it's her pipe dream crashing that truly hurts her. After all, that's what Steve was, a pipe dream. 

 

They enter the diner and take their seat. She fiddles with her fingers and taps the floor with the click of her heel. She scans the menu quickly and sets it down.  
A bubbly waitress waltzes over to greet them with a flash of a smile.  
"Do you happen to have a watch around this place? I'm supposed to be at a meeting at a quarter till 6. Maybe afterward I can treat you to a late dinner." Howard says with a smirk toward the waitress and a wink.  
Peggy rolls her eyes at his flirting and kicks him under the table.  
"I apologise for my friend. He's a bit dense at times. Howard your meeting begins in 23 minutes and approximately 48 seconds. You're free to go. I'll have a cup of tea and probably make my way to work after this. It's alright."

The silent waitress clears her throat. "Gee, that's awfully exact. How do you know the time with no watch?"

Howard laughs as Peggy glares at him. The waitress turns a shade of pink and looks at the exchange between the two.

"Peggy here knows everything. It's best not to question how she does! She's conscientious and diligent." Howard rises to his feet.

"Thanks Peg" He flattens his suit over.  
"This WILL be continued" he points his finger at her and struts out.  
Peggy smiles as best she can and addresses the waitress "Once again, I apologise. He's a tad bit of flirt. One tea, one sugar, hold the milk please."  
"JEESH. You're English, right? That's a lovely accent. I'm Italian so I just talk fast, y'know? But your accent! It's SO dreamy."  
Peggy chuckles softly and tenses at the realization, abruptly stopping her laughter. She looks over at the waitress and cocks her head to the left to examine her. She hasn't laughed in months, but then again everyone's been careful with Peggy. They've all treated her with extra caution and this lady seems so uncensored and carefree that Peggy possibly can't hold back her grin. She begins to fiddle with her fingers again and nods at the girl.  
"Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. My ma and pa always told me my big mouth would get me in trouble one day, I just never thought it'd be with a pretty girl." Angie rambles and nods her hair, making her curls bounce in place. Peggy bites back a smile at the image in front of her, the girl is a walking and talking child.  
"It's quite alright, ma'am."  
"The name's Angie and you're Pegs?"  
"Peggy!"  
"Alright, Peggy."  
They smile at each other and Angie begins to walks away to fetch her tea. She lightly taps the table with her fingers and pictures Steve across the table from her, smiling toward her. From the corner of her eye she catches Angie's feet striding quickly, almost running toward her table, tea in hand.  
"Everything alright, Angie?"  
The waitress scrunches her nose and huffs loudly before grinning. "Yeah, English! There's just a guy in here who always comes right when I'm about to leave and insists on walking me home, sometimes following me for a few blocks when I decline!"  
"He's a regular then?"  
"Definitely. A regular what, I'm not allowed to say while on the clock."  
Peggy chuckles darkly at Angie's words and finds herself grinning again. Angie is refreshing and the warmth she's been avoiding and hasn't been able to find by herself, instead choosing to embrace the frigid air any chance she could. Her thoughts revert back to the man bothering Angie and Peggy can't help but frown. She pretends she's upset that some male finds it perfectly reasonable to follow a girl home after she's politely declined but in all honesty, she's upset that the waitress is leaving. She attempts to put words to her feelings but fails miserably. "You can sit with me for awhile, if you'd like, until he leaves..." Peggy says sheepishly as she reaches over for her tea.  
"Gee! Could I really? I'll be right back! I'm just going to the washroom. There's desserts over to the left, grab me a slice of apple pie, would ya?" Peggy nods.  
"Thanks, Darling!" Angie shouts out from over her shoulder as she walks away.

Peggy slides out of the booth, twirling her fork in hand and walks toward the gentleman Angie had been pointing to. She slightly leans in toward his ear and begins speaking rapidly but enunciating each word thoroughly as to avoid any confusion.  
"The waitress you exert on a daily basis and follow, Angie, she isn't very pleased with you and neither am I."  
She presses the fork against his flesh with a bit of force, enough to cause pain, not any permanent damage for the time being.  
"Just so we're clear, this is pressed into your brachial artery. It may be dull, but I'm determined. Once you start to bleed, you'll lose consciousness in 15 seconds.  
You'll die in 90 unless someone comes to your aid.  
Now, given your recent stalking and behaviour, how likely do you think that is to happen? To prevent this not entirely unfortunate event from occurring, I'd suggest you find a new place to eat. Do we understand each other?" The man nods quickly and begins to pant.

"Yeah. Okay. Thanks, sir. I'm glad we've seen eye to eye on this topic."

 

Peggy releases the tension and begins to twirl the fork in her fingers again as she pats the mans head.  
She saunters toward the dessert section and chooses the biggest slice of pie available for Angie.  
\----------------

 

Angie's in the washroom curling her hair with her fingers attempting to get some volume back into her hair after a long days work. She begins to powder her nose and groans. It's no help she grumbles to herself. Even if she had a full make up set stocked with professional curls, it wouldn't help. This uniform looks ghastly on her and she swears to herself she's going to show her body off to Peggy one day. In normal clothes. She huffs and stalks her way out of the restroom. She mentally smacks herself. Why would Peggy care? 

Peggy probably has a fella who she lives with and has two children with. He's probably English as well, all fancy and proper and prim she says to herself as she catches Peggy sitting in the booth. He's probably uptight she thinks and then she catches Peggy's eyes, her heart swooning in the process.  
\------------  
Angie sits across from her and Peggy can't help but grin. She fights with herself mentally, after months of sulking how could a new friendship make her so happy? Howard didn't quite have the same affect and she sizes it down to Angie's chipper attitude. Or maybe it was her words, or her voice.

Peggy shakes the thought away and slides the piece of apple pie over.  
"I hope you enjoy it!"  
"Oh thanks, English. No sweet tooth?" She lopsidedly smiles at Peggy and digs her fork into her pie, gathering a huge chuck.  
"Pardon?"  
"No dessert for you, I mean."  
"Oh, I enjoy sweets every once in awhile but I don't really have the liking for them."  
"I'm sure you don't." Angie giggles. Peggy looks so reserved in her eyes and she simply can't imagine this English woman pining over a chocolate cake like a school child. She digs her fork into another piece of pie and gestures toward Peggy.  
"Open wide, English. You're gonna love it. I swear it". She begins to reach across the table to feed Peggy and catches the redness in Peggy's cheeks and she can't help but feel pleased with herself.  
Peggy swallows the piece of pie and licks her lips, savouring the taste. It's been ages since she's had some sugar in her life.

"Thanks Ang, it really was delicious."

"No problem, English! So has my charm convinced you to become a regular at this place, now?"

Peggy smiles and nods, "Safe to say, Angie. I feel bad for your stomach. I'm gonna be eating all your sweets from now. Especially after the few months I've been having, I deserve some treats." Peggy grabs the extra fork and digs into the pie. Smiling toward Angie, with her cheeks stuffed.

Angie frowns and quickly resumes her smile. She doesn't quite enjoy the fact that the woman in front of her has had a shady few months but she's happy she's made a new friend.

She mentally reminds herself to get chocolate cake the next time.  
\----------------------  
(10 months after Captain America's death)

"I'm quite fond of you, Angie."  
"Aw shucks, English! I'm fond of you too!" Angie repeats without looking up from her novel.  
It's both their day off and they've spent it lounging around their manor. Their manor, Peggy can't help but repeat the words often in her head. It wasn't even months ago that she couldn't leave her bed without crying and now here she was... laughing and grinning like a child with Angie.  
She's thankful to her past self, her past self who did something so unbelievably kind that she deserved Angie as a reward. She is a firm believer of karma and destiny and she's glad she followed Howard out the door a few months ago.  
"Angie, I'm serious. You've changed my life in ways I couldn't possibly fathom. Before I met you, I was becoming a shell of a person, no. That's not right. Not a shell because I felt things but everything I felt was heartache and now I'm recovering."  
"Why, Margaret Hayley Carter, I do believe you're just about the sweetest thing I've ever encountered."  
"You're my best friend, Ang. I couldn't even make it a day without you."  
"With those legs, you can do anything" Angie whistles and wriggles her eyebrows at Peggy as she becomes increasingly flustered. Angie has that affect on her. She leaves her breathless in all the best possible ways and she leaves her feeling warm all by herself.

 

At nights she still finds herself in the foyer pressed against the firm cold walls as the gelid air sweeps past her flesh and stabs it's way through her skin in very sharp punctures. This is her punishment, for feeling secure and happy with herself during the day. She's out there living her life, with a smile and a laugh whilst Steve is under layers of ice. It's the least she could do, suffer at night. 

 

During the day she allows herself to walk out into the sunlight and feels the warmth. The warmth Captain America once provided for her and the warmth Angie provided for her in those first few months but Angie isn't a love interest and so she can't steal her warmth like she did with Steve.

 

No, in reality, Angie's better than Steve. Peggy prided herself in being an independent woman that didn't have to depend on a man, although Steve was polite unlike the other men, he was strong and secure and he let Peggy put her guard down. She became an entirely new person around Steve and now she shakes her head at the thought. She's pleased to have met him and to have loved him, but this feeling of desperation and isolation without him? It's far too cruel. She swore she'd never be this person. When did she become so invested in another person that she depended on them the way she did with Steve.

 

With Angie, it's different. She's a support. She's there to remind Peggy that she's a strong woman who is independent if not anything else. She shows Peggy that it's okay to seek help when it's truly needed but that above all, she needs to help herself and so with Angie's help, Peggy begins to find her own warmth in the middle of those nights when she can't breathe because he isn't breathing.

 

Angie's the voice in the back of her head, leading her on to become the person she's always envisioned herself to be and for that, she's thankful. Angie is a huge part of her life and she would do anything not to lose her, but Angie isn't her whole life and so yeah, Angie is much better for Peggy instead of Steve. She shakes her head again, not that it matters. They're best friends.

 

\------------  
(11 months after Steve's death)

 

It's been a few days since Peggy has found herself gasping for air in the middle of the night. She begins to shake and feels Angie beside her shift. It's also been a few days since Angie began sharing the bed with her. 

The first time was 5 days ago and it had been raining. They were in the diner as Angie was heading out when a man grabbed Angie by her wrist and smacked her ass with a tip of his hat. Angie huffed and continued moving forward before she was abruptly halted in place by Peggy's confident strut toward them. She was still mesmerised by her legs.

"Pardon, kind sir." Peggy drawls, voice leaking with sarcasm, "I couldn't help but witness this visually striking performance and I think it's just a bit rude."  
Peggy surveys her surroundings and smiles as she realizes the diner is empty. The only other waitress had found herself in the back. As quickly as possible, she stalks behind the man, gripping his neck with her forearm. Angie's eyes widen and she nervously glances around the room.

"Pegs, it's fine, honestly. I'm used to it. Let's just go home" she stutters over the words and bites back a smile. She shouldn't be content about this situation but she can't help but be. Growing up she had 6 sisters and 4 brothers and so she was never one of a kind. She wasn't the oldest or the youngest she was simply one of the children and so no one ever looked out for her. She never had a close friend and even though she was smitten for Peggy, she was fine with being her best friend.

 

"You're going to apologise to my girl. No one disrespects her or else you're going to have an extremely difficult time breathing."  
The man flails a bit, screams an apology out and begins to beg for his release. Peggy releases her grasp on the man and intertwines her fingers with Angie pulling her quickly out of the diner. The rain patters against their coats and they both find themselves groaning. They glance at each other and begin to laugh as they make their way home, as quickly as possibly.

 

They enter the main door and head instantly toward their respective bathrooms, fixing themselves to head to sleep.  
Peggy's fluffing her pillows and adjusting her hair as she hears a slight knock, she mumbles out a "come in" and turns around to meet Angie's big eyes.  
"I just wanted to say thanks for today. You didn't have to do that and it meant a lot." Angie huffs quickly as her eyes glaze over with tears.  
"Oh hey, hey, sweetie. You don't have to cry. You deserve respect and so much more, if I can't give you anything else, I'll make sure you get the respect." Peggy wraps her arms around Angie and draws her in close, their bodies pressing against each other.

 

"Do you mind if I sleep in here? I'm not a huge fan of rain and I'll sleep so much better with someone beside me."

 

Peggy mulls it over, her nightmares haven't gotten any better and she'd rather not place the burden on Angie but she catches Angie's fixed look, her eyes are shining and her bottom lip is protruding and quivering in only a way Angje could perfect.  
"That's perfectly fine" she finds herself saying before she gives it any more thought.  
"So your girl, Huh? What d'ya gotta say for yourself, English?"  
"Hush. It's bed time!"

Angie beams.

 

The next morning she awakens to find her limbs entangled with Angie and she smiles. She slept serenely the entire night and felt her own warmth ease her to sleep for once in months.

 

 

The 4th night Peggy and Angie argued.

That day Howard sticks around with the girls for the entirety of the day. They play cards and eat all the food they can fit. Howard relentlessly hit on Angie and Peggy finds herself disgusted. Angie is giggling and playing along with Howard and she can't help but find herself in a foul mood. She's scowling and casting her eyes anywhere beside toward the pair.

 

Howard makes his way out of the room for some bourbon and Angie leans forward, whispering as quietly as possible for Angie, which wasn't saying much.  
"You okay? You seem tense there. Did I do something wrong?"  
Peggy huffs in ire and narrows her eyes. "No, Angela, but I'll be retreating to my room. Threes a crowd anyway. Good luck on your date!" She quickly makes her escape before Angie can get a word in. It's getting late anyway she convinces herself, she probably should sleep. She begins her nightly routine and thinks of Angie. This wasn't jealously, no. She just always thought Angie was far less gauche than to entertain the idea of Howard. She was just upset that they openly flirted with her in the room. Couldn't they wait? No this wasn't jealously at all. They were best friends after all.

 

A harsh knock interrupts her thoughts and before she can tell Angie to come in, the door is jarred open sending a rattle through the walls. Angie stands there fuming with tight lips.  
"What's your problem, Margaret? I sent Howard home the moment you stalked out of the room."  
"I have no problem. I just figured Howard wasn't your type. How wrong was I?" She laughs ironically and frowns. She tries to pinpoint exactly why she's so upset but she can't and so she's going to continue to lash out.

 

"What is this? Who I find myself liking is none of your concern."  
"It is my concern if it affects me" she snaps and treads her way toward Angie, encircling the girl.  
"Even if I did like him, WHICH I DO NOT, it wouldn't affect you. I just like the attention." Angie screams toward the taller woman and continues in a lower voice, " I haven't gotten attention in awhile, so it was nice. I'm sorry, English." 

Peggy can tell her tone is genuine and it calms her nerves, leaving her slightly more relaxed and the tension in the air begins to evaporate. Slowly.  
"I'm so sorry, Ang. I didn't realize that. I'll give you attention. I'll do anything to make you happy."  
Angie nods and turns around, clutching the doorknob as Peggy speaks up.  
"Mind sleeping with me again? I just slept so well, it's alright if you say no. I just, I enjoyed your company."  
Angie nods once again, shuffles her way toward the bed and lays down. They're both clearly upset with each other.  
Peggy lifts the covers and gets comfortable facing Angie as Angie turns around, her back toward Peggy. She can't help but notice the space between them, Angie must be grasping at the edge of the bed to remain her distance. Peggy blinks her eyes and reaches over, gripping Angie's waist. She feels the girl tense and relax as she slowly drags Angie toward her until her body is flush against her, her arm wraps around her waist and she reaches over with her other arm to stroke her hair.  
"I'm really sorry, Angie. I acted like a child. You're important to me, y'know?"  
Angie grins at the y'know. She's glad to see her vocabulary has slowly seeped it's way into Peggy's. She wraps her fingers around Peggy's and pulls her closer.  
"It's okay, English. Good night."

 

Peggy doesn't wake up until the morning, still cradling Angie.

 

The third night was peaceful. Neither of them addressed or asked the other about sleeping in the same bed, they just found themselves wrapped up in each other. This time they lay facing each other, Angie's fingers fiddling with the hem around Peggy's shoulders.  
Peggy awoke in the middle of the night, breathing evenly. She rolls around and grabs Angie's arms, wrapping herself in Angie's embrace. She feels the younger girl's fingers squeeze her and pull her in closer. She smiles and falls back asleep easily.

 

The second night they drink schnapps and listen to vinyls. They talk for hours in bed and cuddle against each other. Peggy finds herself seated against the headboard with Angie sitting between her legs. She wraps her arms around Angie and fiddles with the hem of her dress. She kisses Angie's collar bone and smiles at the thought of kissing Angie. She can't deny her feelings any longer. 

They aren't best friends. This was something more. This was more than what she felt for Steve. Steve was her hero and the person she aspired to be. Steve was pure and without fault. Steve and her were so engrossed in the war that they found a common ground when they were both lonely, but that wasn't love. This was. Sitting with your soul mate in the middle of the night, discussing all there is to discuss and being content with their presence. She knew much more about Angie than she did about Steve.

 

Off the top of her head she could list 3 things Angie did that on a daily basis that irritated her to no end!

 

Angie rolls her eyes at half of the things Peggy says and although she finds it adorable (something she'd never admit) she finds herself huffing in annoyance at Angie's manners.  
Angie often interrupts Peggy mid-speech to comment followed by something closely related. She loves to hear Angie's voice but gosh! could that girl talk.  
Angie always defends Peggy but hardly defends herself. This she hated the most. Angie loved Peggy enough to come to her aid whenever possible, but how could she not love herself as much?

 

She couldn't list any of Steve's faults. She could hardly mention any of Steve's positives that didn't include his opinions on politics or social norms.  
"What're ya thinking about, Sweetheart?" Angie whispers as she turns around, crouched on all fours. Face to face with Peggy. Her breath hitches slightly as she witnesses the contours of Angie's lips and she shakes her head.  
"You."  
"Oh ya?" Angie raises an eyebrow and leans in close, resting her forehead against Peggy's and she wraps her arms around Angie's neck, pressing her chest against the older girl. "What about me?"  
"Oh, you know."  
Angie connects their lips and Peggy swears she could faint. She's never experienced this before. When she kissed Steve, she was always cold and he was always warm. When she kissed Steve there was friction.  
When she kissed Steve, she grasped onto his back, pulling him closer, stealing his warmth, but with Angie. No. She was warmth and she was kissing more warmth. She didn't need to steal a part of Angie to make herself whole and she feels the pleasant sting of Angie's lips. She runs her tongue against her lips and sucks on Angie's lips, emitting a slow moan from the Italian in the process. Eventually they release each other and stare at one another.  
"Now I know. Let's go to sleep, English."

 

Instantly Peggy grabs Angie by her waist and settles them onto the bed, laying down. She kisses her over and over until they fell asleep. That night she awakens several times to view Angie's sleeping figure. Each time she goes back to sleep soundly with only Angela Martinelli in her mind.

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any questions, ask... I'm very anal with my writing and have the entire story mapped out along with boring details that won't make its way into the story. I promise this will mostly be Peggy/Carter but I'm just trying to set the scene!  
> Please leave comments (it helps me so much)


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